Comments on: Does My Presence Offend Your White Able-Bodied Male Privilege?

By: Disability and Representation» Blog Archive » You Don’t Have to Thank Me For Doing the Right Thing

Mon, 29 Jul 2013 18:23:54 +0000

[...] a couple of experiences in which people became actively hostile, I decided to take a different approach. I [...]

By: Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg

Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg — Tue, 16 Jul 2013 21:52:30 +0000

Alexia, you ask a good question. My point was not that only white men engage in these kinds of microaggressions. My point was that, in this instance, the man’s racial, ability, and gender privileges were all working together to make him feel that he had the authority to occupy that space. There was an authority about his demeanor that was a taken-for-granted kind of authority; it felt very different from a person of color taking the same authority over the space. The attitude of authority that comes from oppressed people usually feels hard won; it does not feel as though they grew up believing the world was simply going to open to them. The kind of authority that comes from non-oppressed people feels nearly effortless, as though they were born into it and take it to be part of the natural course of things. I have that kind of authority as a white person; it’s somewhat undercut by my gender and ability status, but it’s still there. I assume that I’m *supposed* to have authority. Part of the crisis of being diagnosed with disabilities was my sudden realization that I was losing part of that authority by entering a stigmatized group. I can never lose it all, however.

By: Alexia

Alexia — Tue, 16 Jul 2013 21:00:34 +0000

In today’s world manners certainly seemed to have fallen by the wayside. I am sorry that you had to stand your ground and I’m glad you did.

I do take some exception though to your description as to what that man had been thinking in his mind, you wrote “What is the world coming to when an able-bodied white man can’t expect people to get out of his way”. Why in the world did you have to put “white” in there? I have come in contact with many rude people in public of ALL colors, ethnicity,religion, etc. Color OR lack there of certainly does not designate someone as rude, aggressive, nice or courteous.

I feel you had no reason to go THERE and I certainly wish everyone would stop going THERE. The less we see people by their skin color and more we seen them as fellow human beings, the better everyone will get along.

By: CJ

CJ — Tue, 16 Jul 2013 07:43:17 +0000

I can’t imagine how truly HARD it is to be disabled – I can’t even get out of bed with a bad back from PMS – but this article truly re-opened my eyes about my own bad behavior. I am forever complaining about other people’s bad manners, especially healthy people parking in handicap spots. And yet, I know for sure in a fit of frustration or anger that I have stormed out of the DMV or wherever, frustrated, hurried and never even looking or thinking who I just cut off, banged into or blew away with my rudeness and ignorance. It’s pretty hypocritical I know. At 51, I should know better. Thanks for the reminder to be a better human.

By: Cathy Y.

Cathy Y. — Tue, 16 Jul 2013 06:16:42 +0000

I experienced something similar in my pregnancies with my 2 youngest. After having 2 children in my 20s, I got remarried and had 2 more kids when I was 40+. I am also plus-size. People would actually try to squeeze by me, pushing me out of their way in a store, I suppose thinking that someone 40+ and large could not possibly be (gasp) pregnant! And I totally “get” the disability issues here, too. I have a lot of disabling conditions from FM to lupus to foot problems to auditory processing, and the list goes on. There are lots of things people “expect” me to be able to do with two young children in tow (now ages 8 and 4). Just wanted to bring up the pregnancy story to show the correlation.

By: Disabled Girl Turned Away from Museum Because Her Wheelchair Might Get the Carpets Dirty | Pakalert Press

Tue, 16 Jul 2013 04:32:53 +0000

[...] less accessible. Disability rights activist Rachel Cohen-Rottenberg wrote yesterday on her blog, Disability and Representation, about what she calls “microaggressions.” As an example, she relates a recent experience at the [...]

By: Shelley

Shelley — Fri, 12 Jul 2013 02:15:54 +0000

“Excuse me, I’m disabled. I go around you and I will fall on you. Please go around me.”
Nice, succinct, polite.

By: West

West — Fri, 12 Jul 2013 01:16:41 +0000

This post made me think of one I’ve seen several times on tumblr:

http://bonnienoire.tumblr.com/post/47136484422/penjolina-piddlebucket-randomstabbing

I find it so so hard to NOT get out of the way for (apparently) white cis guys, and some days I don’t have the guts to try to take up my own space and make THEM move. But ever since I became consciously aware that this happens, I do try.

Go Mom for not moving and hurting yourself!!! That jerk needs people to move out of the way for him less often.

By: n.

n. — Thu, 11 Jul 2013 23:18:54 +0000

I always assume that ppl using mobility devices own the space and that I’m automatically in *their* way, because either they need more space to get by or they have more built in inconvenience of moving elsewhere. Which leads to me saying “sorry” if I even think I’ve delayed a person by not letting them have the whole space they need. Which apparently is rude (i read so on another disability rights blog but never quite understood why).

No idea what you should have said to the guy. Maybe get 2 canes, one for whacking his ilk over the head with.