I guess I just wanted to throw in some optimism to counter the criticism there….. I don’t see it the way you’ve described it at all, and I’m sure I can’t be the only one. People aren’t ALL full of negative stereotypes and assumptions.

Yes! I worked with a therapist for awhile who is very aware of disability rights issues, and we talked a lot about the work I do with my writing. She was very supportive of my truth that most of what depresses me has to do with stigma and discrimination, and with the ways in which I’ve internalized negative attitudes about disability from the world around me. By the time I went to see her, I had largely adapted to my disabilities, so the question really became how to navigate other people’s attitudes. In a lot of ways, our discussions of the work I do with my writing helped me to claim the value of my form of activism, and to develop pride and inner strength to deal with what the world dishes out. What was most helpful was realizing that I didn’t have to be doing the sort of activism that, given my sensory issues, would be very difficult — like taking a bus to protests or talking with my legislators — and that simply speaking out in my own voice was enough.

The second part of your post spoke to me about locus of control, and it really made me think. I’ve been known myself to say to people with disabilities that I’ve worked with, “Focus on what you can control. You can’t control that person’s ignorant atttitude and what it makes him say; you can only control how you react.” But you’re right that it does put all the onus on the person with the disability to develop a thick skin. Perhaps a better way for therapists is to assist the person to develop coping strategies while helping them to explore what they feel they can do in their circumstances to feel like they’re contributing to changing peoples’ attitudes?

Anyway thank you for sharing your thoughts and your knowledge, I love your blog!! it often rings a bell and makes me think of things in other ways! Merci!!

ps : sorry for the grammar mistakes, I’m french…

Anyway, it’s a great post and it’s very applicable to me as I raise teens and tweens who are going to need to find their place in the world and change it, all at the same time. That part I totally agreed with and understood. 🙂

Dena, for any image, there are multiple interpretations possible. If you’ll note, I suggested the possibility that the elderly lady was thinking of a former self. There is nothing wrong with doing so if one is simply enjoying a happy memory. However, the text overlays a value onto the image, and it draws a contrast being the perceptions of others, in which being old and disabled is a bad thing, and one’s self-perception, in which being young and able-bodied is a good thing. It’s the devaluation of being old and disabled that I’m critiquing here — not whether it’s okay to enjoy a happy memory. As I age, I get a great deal of sustenance from my memories. That’s very different from feeling good about myself by imagining myself as a young woman when I’m in my mid-50s. I’m not a young woman, and in order to feel good about myself, I have to feel good about who I am right now, not about who I once was.

And just to be clear: I don’t judge the validity of an interpretation based on credentials, so whether you have a master’s degree or not really isn’t important to me. I judge the validity of an interpretation on its merits; people are free to disagree with my interpretations whenever they see fit, and I will listen and reflect. If someone has a credential that gives that person a particular expertise and insight into something I’m saying, I will respect that, but I won’t automatically agree with the person or assume that the person must be right.

What I see is an elderly lady who is remembering when she was an accomplished ballerina. She is playing her music on her victrola and seeing her younger self. The smile on her face shows her happiness at the memory. She is not trying to instill the thought into anyone elses mind. I may not have a masters degree but I do know what (I) see.

Yes, my editor’s eye went to that as well. I decided to concentrate on the content. 🙂